Captain S. Melly takes over as the new Commanding Officer at an experimental mixed sex air defence base. It's 1940 and England is under heavy bombardment, but the crew seem more interested in each other than the enemy planes above. Captain Melly plans to put a stop to all this, and becomes the target of a campaign to abandon his separatist ideals... Written by

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filmbuff69007 (filmbuff69007@aol.com)
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Rotten script Wrong actors. Patrick Mower was not suited to comedy and neither was judy gleeson.this should of had Trevor Bannister and wendy richard it would of been better.Kenneth Connor looks like he would rather be somewhere else only Windsor Davis comes out with any credit.

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BritishFilms1 from Scotland
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When I read the comments about this film, I knew it would be bad, but it is not just bad, it is pathetic. By the time this entry was made, the gags were too familiar, too many regulars were missing and the series was half-way into its grave. Also, Sid James had sadly passed away. I missed him, Kenneth Williams, Charles Hawtrey and the gang.

There is far too much nudity for a Carry On, there is only four regulars (Connor, Sims, Butterworth and Douglas) and they show little enthusiasm, the script is a mess, the budget was far too tight, there was too many newcomers who were a complete waste of space. The whole thing is a stab in the back to THE Carry On series.

It is very sad to see Kenneth Connor transformed from his lovable Cockney bumbler into a bombastic little Hitler. Peter Butterworth looks bored and uninterested, not that he had much to do, like poor Joan Sims, who is given the most ridiculous of cameo roles and Jack Douglas is also wasted.

The only saving grace is Windsor Davies as the bellowing Sergeant Major. Patrick Mower and Judy Geeson were just not Carry On material.

This film is only to be watched as an instrument of torture. I admit that NOT ALL Carry Ons were great, but this is just inexcusable. Watch ALL other Carry Ons before and including BEHIND, with the possible exception of JACK, but stay well clear of this crap.

0/10

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Superwonderscope from Brosville, France
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Unable to raise a few laughs, CARRY ON ENGLAND is the swan song of the serie. Even afterwards, CARRY ON EMMANUELLE or/and COLOMBUS made it too painful to live through.

The screenplay is simply non-existent, just a symptom of one. The lead characters are poor. The cinematography is plain Tv-movie like. The routine is based on trousers taken off, shoutings, lovemaking then trousers taken off, shoutings, lovemaking then, oh, I forgot, some breasts quickly shown. Simply NOT FUNNY.

Joan Sims has a ridiculous part and it's real shame, being the only decent actress all around. Judy Geeson is awfully bad, giving the worst performance of her career with Norman J Warren's INSEMINOID. Peter Rogers & Gerald Thomas were incapable of finding a new breath in the Carry On serie : the new actors just don't work together and the screenwriters (they were two!!!) just try to put some rehash of some stuff made years ago and way much better.

I really missed Hattie Jacques, Kenneth Williams, Barbara Windsor and the whole bunch. They were worth watching any Carry On even though the screenplays were really poor, like in CARRY ON AT YOUR CONVENIENCE. But I guess everything has an end, but this one is really painful to watch. My fast forward button still remember it!

If you want to try something really funny, then get CARRY ON MATRON or CARRY ON UP THE KHYBER, these are are true gems. But you can pass that one.

2/10

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Janos Smal (jsmal@osi.hu) from Budapest, Hungary
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During WW II., a short but aggressive major tries to regulate an experimental "mixed" military team, consisting of both men and women.

One of the worst in the series that was really at the end of its tether, a dimly unamusing comedy with feeble and well-telegraphed jokes and very uncomfortable cast. An appalling and alarming sign that too many new faces appeared on both sides of the camera, none of which having much fun.

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qrt7 from Aber, Wales
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Rubbish. Along with Carry on Emmanuelle this is the worst of the series. I've got a lot of time for these films, but this was inexcusable. By this time (1976) the joke was no longer funny and the juice had run dry, as Sid James might have put it.

Only two of the Carry On regulars are in this and even they look bored. The jokes are staid and formulaic, delivered with the speed and panache of a postman. The budget for the film appeared to be ?2.50.

Even Windsor Davies' Sergeant's bellowing couldn't save this.

1.5/10

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xysmithe from United Kingdom
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this is absolutely awful. I heard that Carry on Emmanuelle was the worst of the series, but this really is. I bought this and started watching it four times then turned it off...only watched it fully the fifth time around, it's really that bad.

Joan Sims looks bloated and old, Kenneth Connor's not the little bloke with humorous quirks that we know and love him for in the series...there's nothing in here that actually works. There's no gags that are humorous.

There's a hugely embarrassing scene where there's a soldier blinking heavily....and Kenneth Connor asks him 'why he's blinking'. The gag commences for a minute 'why are you blinking?' 'no I'm blinking not' 'yes you blinking are'....That unfortunately is the level of humour used in this awful film.

You can see them trying to go back to Carry on Sergeant...but that's like trying to find Debbie Harry attractive when she's an eighty year old pensioner based on 'how she used to be'.

Kenneth Connor in his first lead role for the Carry on's deserved better than this. Patrick Mower is not carry on material.

avoid.

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TC Raymond from England
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This is really the bottom of the barrel as far as the Carry On series is concerned. After Talbot Rothwell, the genius scriptwriter whose flair for spiralling innuendo and cringe-makingly obvious jokes, retired from the series in 1974, the Carry Ons were doomed. This film is so bad, it's embarrassing. Kenneth Connor struggles manfully with a part that calls for little more than foul-tempered, authoritarian bluster, Windsor Davies drags us through his tried-and-tested eyeball rolling, gurning and bellowing routines, Patrick Mower makes you wish Kenneth Cope had been cast instead, and Judy Geeson shows just how quickly a promising celluloid career can nosedive - from the brilliant TO SIR WITH LOVE to this smutty mess in just eight years. Shame. This is one of the most depressing so-called 'comedies' I've ever seen, and I doubt it'd be any funnier if you watched it whilst drunk. Stick to Convenience, Loving, Up The Khyber, Cleo or Camping for true Carry On genius.

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ShadeGrenade from Ambrosia
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When Sid James died in 1976, you'd think Peter Rogers and Gerald Thomas would have had the sense to let the 'Carry on' series die with him. He had become, over the years, the 'boss' of that marvellous gang of comics, and to try and pretend it was going to be the same without him was sheer folly. They also had the departure of scriptwriter Talbot Rothwell to deal with. Dave Freeman's script for 'Carry On Behind' was okay, but calling on David Pursall and Jack Seddon ( writers of M.G.M's delightful 'Miss Marple' series, starring Margaret Rutherford ) to expand an unmade episode of A.T.V.'s 'Carry On Laughing' into a film screenplay was clearly a mistake - neither had a feel for innuendo-based comedy.

The film is set in somewhere in England in 1940. Captain S.Melly ( Kenneth Connor ) is appointed new Commanding Officer of an experimental mixed sexes' anti-aircraft base. He arrives to find a guard wearing lipstick, and female underwear in full view on clothes lines. The combined unit of men and women include 'Sergeant Len Ready' ( Patrick Mower ), 'Gunner Shorthouse' ( Melvyn Hayes ), 'Sergeant Tilly Willing' ( Judy Geeson ), and 'Private Alice Easy' ( Diane Langton ), and their names are the funniest jokes in the film. The men and women of the unit are less interested in the war than in getting into bed with one another - as often as possible.

Melly's attempts to impose discipline make him unpopular, and the target of a series of rather nasty practical jokes, such as falling repeatedly in cow dung, having his uniform fall to pieces during a march, and his soap changed so that he turns blue when he next tries to shower. With a name like 'S. Melly', you can guess what the unit have decided to rechristen him. Connor is one of the best 'Carry on' performers, yet this leaden script gives him absolutely nothing funny to say or do. Windsor Davies' 'Sergeant-Major 'Tiger' Bloomer' is a poor carbon-copy of his 'B.S.M. Williams' from the B.B.C. sitcom 'It Ain't 'Alf Hot, Mum'. Seeing T.V. tough-guy Patrick Mower try to be a chirpy Corkney in the mold of Jim Dale is about as funny as watching open-heart surgery. Poor Judy Geeson! Wasted in a role that Wendy Richard could have done so much better. 'Carry on' veterans Jack Douglas, Peter Butterworth, Joan Sims, and Julian Holloway likewise fall flat in weakly scripted roles.

This feels less like a 'Carry on', and more like one of those dreadful Ned Sherrin & Terry Glinwood 'Up Pompeii!' spin-offs such as 'Up The Front' and 'Up The Chastity Belt'. In fact the former ( set in The Great War ) is a comic masterpiece by comparison.

'England' opened to hostile reviews and poor box office takings. Though an attempt was made to broaden its appeal by removing the female nudity and some of the more suggestive gags, it proved in vain. Time had moved on. Audiences wanted Mel Brooks, Woody Allen, the 'Monty Python' team ( John Belushi and Dan Ackroyd were about to burst on the scene in 'National Lampoon's Animal House' ), and not what was left of the 'Carry on' gang augmented by strange faces. Mind you, even Sid, Hattie, Kenneth and Charlie would have had a job making this script funny. The nadir is when Melly swallows cascara to remove a tunic button from his digestive system. It takes effect, he starts farting uncontrollably, and as he runs to the W.C., the film suddenly speeds-up, like a Benny Hill sketch. 'Carry on' fans' surely covered their eyes in embarrassment at this point.

The Imperial War Museum is thanked in the credits for the 'loan of the gun'. Pity it was not also thanked for its restraint in not complaining about this dismal film.

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crossbow0106 from United States
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Set in 1940 in England, this is a story about a particular military outfit made up of men and woman who were particularly inept, lazy and probably a bit oversexed. Sid James, who wasn't supposed to be here anyway, passed away before the film was done. He could have brought some life into this, he was a great comedian. This movie is very shrill, lots of yelling, lots of noise. Does the new general of this company whip these people into shape? Do you care? The jokes are very obvious here, and I was only semi-amused a few times. The movie seems labored, and that is not good for a Carry On film. I would only recommend this film for Carry On completists. Otherwise, there are other films in the series which are infinitely better (examples are Carry On Doctor, Carry On Abroad, Carry On-Don't Lose Your Head etc).

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mutty-mcflea from Lincolnshire, UK
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A weak late entry in the 'Carry On' canon, this one has a few series stalwarts like Kenneth Connor, Joan Sims and Peter Butterworth but they have nothing to work with. There are no real laughs here, just a couple of mild chuckles towards the end.

One major problem here is that the script contains virtually no funny lines, and the other is that the shower of randy soldiers in the mixed battery who cause trouble for Connor's hapless Captain are a charmless bunch, so full of annoying muggers like Patrick Mower and Judy Geeson that I was on Connor's side throughout.

This is really ropey stuff that gets by only on the energetic performances of Connor and Windsor Davies as a bellowing Sergeant-Major; they may not be subtle but no one can accuse them of not putting their all into the lacklustre material.

carry on|country in title|three word title|sequel|independent film|

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Certifications:
Australia:PG / Iceland:L / UK:A (original rating) (passed with cuts) / UK:PG (tv rating) / UK:PG (video rating) (1987) (2001) (2003)